I'm exactly 7 days away from what seems to be the end of a very good school year for me. I shudder at the thought of 2 whole empty wasted months, I shudder also, at the thought of going to express. I know, this is what I've wanted. This is what I've been working my butt off for. Right? Right. I told myself to except whatever came my way because in the end I guess it's better for my future. But what if the rest of my life is like THIS? THIS , being always planning for my stupid future which I can't control. This future that is as uncertain as the next. I may look back and want to slap myself for losing I guess the most perfect class I've had ever since well, never. In MGS I was the bad one who talked too much, too loud, and never handed up her homework. THAT girl who made teachers uncertain of their teaching skills, who made peers wonder if she could do ANYTHING right. But staying in NA is just not right. I know not everyone who went to express became "RICH" or successful but I just want something secure, something safe. Well, that's all I can do I guess. Try, right?